Sunday, January 2, 2011

Confusion Answered.

Okay.
I know I've been completely infrequent with my posts,
and I apologize for that.
BUT
The reason for this is because
I've been out there learning and making mistakes,
in order to give you the feedback you like :]
I'm about to pour my heart out on this one,
so stay with me.
I'm no longer confused about how to act or react.
I have a solid answer.
Which is exactly what I wanted...
Now, was the substance of the answer I got
exactly what I wanted?
Well,
at first I didn't think it was.
At first,
I was kinda upset about it.
Upset that he didn't like me enough to become something more.
BUT
after thinking about it,
that what I always want.
I have never been the girl who wanted a boyfriend,
I've never wanted to be stuck with one person,
so why did I confuse myself this time?
Well,
to be honest
it's probably because I genuinely liked him.
But that's beyond the point.
I think the reason I was prepared to commit so quickly
was because all of my friends told me I was supposed to.
No really,
anyone that knows me,
knows I'm not the relationship girl.
I'm a flirt.
I like to have fun.
Commitment scares me.
I lost track of who I was for a few weeks.
There's the key words there:
"few weeks."
I had only known this guy for like 20 days.
That is an outrageous amount of time for me to:
meet boy.
fall for boy.
date boy.
want to COMMIT to boy.
20 days!
Wow. wow. wow.
That is just not like me at all.
And now I remember that.
Yeah,
it still hurts a little to know I won't see him again,
but most likely it's for the best.
Maybe in a few years
we'll both be the single ones in our groups of friends
and we'll meet again.
Maybe we'll be more grown up
and ready for relationships.
Maybe I'll never see him again...
But one thing is for sure,
I learned from it
and it was fun while it lasted,
because we were a pretty good match.
Keep your smile and your guard up line,
both will get you where you want to be.
Happy to help.
Bee <3

6 comments:

  1. Why won't you see him again, and was this decision mutual? Or you were just the one to say na thanks? I'm a little confused

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  2. Well originally I decided I wouldn't see him again because it would be kinda hard for me since we wanted different things, but now that I realize I don't actually want to be in a relationship I probably could see him again. I'm about to start a super intense term in school and I wouldn't have the time to be a good girlfriend anyway.

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  3. So he was ready to commit and you weren't...am I caught up now? lol. Hey that's understandable about school and such. Well all you can rely on is God's path for you B :) Now as soon as you can find me someone like you, let me know haha. Well written btw.

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  4. Nope, for once in my life it was the other way around. lol aww Thanks:)

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