XXX Went from "In A Relationship" to "Single"

Recently,
my Facebook has BLOWN UP with relationship status changes.
Like,
WHOA.
Last week I counted 14 people on my news feed who are now single.
Granted I'm one of them,
but let's talk about it.
This is awesome!
Congratulations to everyone who got to change that status!
Bet you didn't see that coming...
Unless you've been following from the beginning,
in which you're not even a little surprised at my excitement for the newfound independence.
Yes,
being sad about it is certainly okay.
In fact,
it's important.
You have to go through the five stages of loss (This has been adapted from the five stages of Grief, formerly used for coping with the death of a loved one)
before you can be entirely over the relationship.
This might take time.
Here are the 5 stages.
See if you can find the spot you're in:

1) Denial and Isolation- At first, we tend to deny that the breakup has occurred. We'll tell ourselves "No, he/she didn't mean that... They'll call me in a few hours apologizing..."
Unfortunately,
they DID mean it,
and they're NOT going to call you and apologize.
Sorry.
During this stage of denial,
typically we withdraw from our social groups
and isolate ourselves.
Sometimes it's because you don't need reminder that your ex isn't going to be there with you,
and sometimes it's because you just can't face anyone to tell them the news,
because maybe he/she will change their mind...
 Sorry again...
They won't.

2) Anger- During this stage, we often feel angry or bitter for having been hurt.
SOMETIMES we actually lash out at him/her,
and EVERY time we'll want to.
It's only natural to feel this way.
You trusted them with your heart and they crushed it.
You can be angry for a little while.
It feels better than the sadness anyway.
BUT,
don't hold onto it too long,
because eventually it'll get old.
You don't want to be the bitter ex.
It's just not attractive.

3) Bargaining- This can go two ways.
We can begin by bargaining with a higher power in hopes to take away the pain.
for example, it might go a little like this, "If I donate this money to the shelter then he/she will love me again." or "If I turn the doorknob five times to the left, then five to the right, he/she will call me in 5 minutes."
Be careful with this.
Make sure it doesn't become an OCD habit.

4) Depression- This stage SUCKS.
It hurts the most.
At this point, your friends are a little worried about you.
You might skip class or work because you just can't bring yourself to get out of bed.
It's almost a feeling of numbness.
You may still feel a little anger or sadness,
but you're mostly indifferent to life around you.
I know this is a tough place to be,
but do NOT stay in it for too long.
It's the most dangerous place to be.
You may not want to,
but try to get out and do something.
Even going for a walk will be helpful.

5) Acceptance- This stage is when the bitterness, sadness and mourning has sort of tapered off.
You're no longer obsessing about their call.
You don't hate them.
You don't cry yourself to sleep.
You're just you.
But a better you.
A stronger you.
Your standards stay high,
because you know you're worth it.
Don't forget that.
You're worth it.
And while your going through these five stages,
just know that it always gets better.
You will feel better as the days go on.
Sure,
there might be a few days where you feel worse than before,
but that's temporary.
That's life.
It'll get better.
I promise.
Stay strong.
Much love,
Bee.

Math Equations and Exes.

So...
The last post ended badly...
I ruptured my eardrum on the plane...
It hurt.
Real bad.
But anyway I'm okay now
and on medication and stuff.
Back to the relationship advice stuff.
Let's go over Ex advice,
since almost everyone has one.

First off:
If you and your significant other just split up, I'm sorry because it hurts.

Now:
I know it may be hard, but you have to cut off connection with them.
Yes, you can "still be friends", but not right now.
When you've just separated from someone,
maintaining contact will only make the situation worse for you both.
Don't drag it out.
Later on you can be friends,
right now you're exes.
Getting over someone you loved takes time.
There's an equation that will give you a rough estimate of how much time it will take you to get over them.
Basically it's like this:
X/2= :)

AKA The time you were dating them, divided by two, will give you the amount of time it will take you to be over them, at the greatest.

So say I date someone for 5 months, then we break up. It will take me 2.5 months AT MOST to be over them. Usually you're over them before that time.

BUT, the only way to get over them, is to not be around them or talk to them.
Your heart needs time to heal
and your brain needs to remember how to be without them again.
Erase them from your phone.
That way you're not tempted to call or text them.
Unless they did something terrible, erasing them from your Facebook is unnecessary because it can cause drama.
However if they cheated on you or did something bad,
erase away!
However,
You don't want to constantly look at their page,
so if you don't want to erase them,
then hide them from your news feed.
That way when they put up a picture with a new person,
you don't go stalk their page. [Note: Avoid looking at their page. Facebook is the NUMBER 1 cause of break-ups in America. It makes people jump to conclusions]
If they contact you and it was a mutual or a clean break-up,
You can politely say you both need space and time away from each other.
Tell them you will contact them when you're ready to be friends again.
If they contact you begging for you back after they cheated on you,
ignore them.
Block them.
Once a cheater,
always a cheater.
You gotta protect yourself line.
Keepin' it in perspective.
Happy to help:]
Bee